177 Dumbest Criminal Stories The Southwest

Professor Birdsong is out with another volume of his Dumbest Criminal stories. And he has done it again! Many of his stories are so funny that they will make you laugh out loud. He has managed to use his expertise and experience in criminal law to bring you 177 more of the most outrageous and dumbest criminal law stories from around the world. This new volume features stories of dumb criminals from China and the Far East, Stories from Around the Indian Ocean basin, Russia and Eastern Europe, the United Kingdom and France, as well as stories from Canada and Mexico. There is the story of a Chinese woman accused of killing a shopkeeper by squeezing his scrotum when he asked her not park her motorbike in front of his shop; her grip was so strong that the man went into shock and died. Then there is the story about a South Korean airline passenger who was not allowed to bring a certain liquid on the plane. She drank the liquid in front of airline officials but refused to swallow. When officials made her spit the liquid into a bucket they found she was attempting to sneak dozens of tadpoles on board. In India we learn about the use of “weapons-grade” spice wherein a group of criminals hijacked a train and freed a fellow gang member by throwing locally made chili powder in the face of police chasing them. They got away with it, too. From Australia there was a 20-year-old thief who stole a tanker truck containing 5,811 gallons of milk and led police on a two hour chase. From Poland we learn of a man who sued his ex-wife for a refund on the $8,000 he had spent on her breast implants. From Germany we find that a well-endowed woman allegedly tried to kill her boyfriend by smothering him with her size 38 DD breasts. Then there is the one about the English man arrested for having sex with his girlfriend’s dog. The stories just go on and on; this book covers just about every silly, unlawful citizens from around the in the globe. The stories are all true stories. Full of his witty “Birdsong” commentary the book is sure to deliver some great laughs. Professor Birdsong presents a wide variety of just plain, dumb criminals that make this anthology worth reading and, will, as previously stated, at times, make you laugh out loud.

​Sample Story:

CHINA: Murder, by way of malicious gonad grabbing? A woman has been accused of killing a man by squeezing his scrotum. The gonad attack came when the man complained to the woman about parking her motor scooter in front of his store. The argument got so heated that the woman grabbed the shopkeeper and yelled, “I’ll squeeze it to death! You’ll never have children again!” Her grip was so strong the man went into shock and died.

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